Listen to What the Man Said

A carpenter friend of mine was hired by an eccentric woman to turn a barn into a dog shelter. He and his partner were the third set of carpenters to work on this project, so they started work with question marks hovering over their heads. Three weeks later they were outta there. A new set of carpenters moved in and a few weeks later word got around that they, too, had moved on.

Why are some work relationships easy and others hard?

In the case of the dog-lady, there were many obvious issues, the least of which were the untamed angry dogs getting underfoot and even attacking the workmen.

Although snarling animals may be a once-in-a-lifetime project challenge, some client relationships have equally devilish roadblocks--ones without teeth but which will sneak up and bite you just as hard.

The key to any good relationship is listening. By listening, I don't mean listen then act. I mean listen, question, understand, set expectations, deliver.

You are the expert. You've been called by this prospective client because he's heard about your work, checked your references, looked you up on Yelp or at least liked your ad. You are there as the authority. This is an important point! You aren't the skilled hands with $20,000 worth of tools hired to do what you're told. You are there to interpret and advise, and to use your expertise to get the client not necessarily what they THINK they need, but what they REALLY need.

Here is a checklist for launching a successful client relationship:

• Schedule your meeting for enough time to really understand the project. Don't meet your client if they have to rush off, and make sure you won't have to leave in the middle of an important thought yourself. Your first meeting will set the stage for trust and communication.
• Listen well. Listening well includes keeping your mouth shut, letting the client fill the silences with new thoughts and questions they might have, and asking follow up questions. Many people get catch phrases or terms in their head but don't really know what the terms mean. Repeat and describe them to make sure they understand what they're asking for.
• Act quickly before you all forget the plan. Follow up the conversation within days, whether with more questions, a work plan, or a schedule to meet again. This does two things; it keeps you both from forgetting what was decided, and it furthers the trust you are building between you.
• Beware! Like the woman described above, you'll feel red flags pop up in your head. Don't ignore them. Beware of clients who can't say what they mean, can't make up their mind, or want you to work on a funny schedule. If a client wants something they can't afford and can't do themselves, you're going to have trouble unless you address it up front.
• And finally, collaborate with industry partners--i.e. hire people smarter than you. Know your strengths and bring in others who are experts and what they do. Everyone will be happier.